The death drive, driving me
Driving me home
Teleportation to the dark side
Where my mirror image resides and concocts deviant schemes
My soul shall repent for
Reams of tears to release and unleash
As if from a sheath, a torrent of thundering rain ejects from open eyes
Taking comfort in the pain
Yet I cannot stop this endless stream that is flowing like a river violently raging through
The landscape desolate, barren and cruel
You used “I love you” as a tool
You did not mean it when you said it
Maybe you were lonely
Maybe you were ready for a change
Maybe you were in love with the idea of love
The motives are sometimes rather strange
When you use “I love you” the way you do
So casually and misconstrued
So recklessly, too easy, monotonous, untrue…
I did know better
…but it was not the excellence of your theatrics that sold me
That particular trait is not something new
It was the length of time and dedication invested
To bring down the boundaries and the walls
To get me to say “I love you” too
…yet it really was not true
Clear your mind
From all the stress
It does not matter any more
Let go…
The weight too heavy
The heart too sore
This is nothing to fight for
Release the hold
Breaking my self down
No reason to shy away from the reality
I have to look inward
I must see
no more delusions
no more cognitive dissonance
no more false imagery
no more unconscious existence
Stepping into the light as a conscious being
