Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do, or don’t. Either way, survival mode does not ask for permission, it demands presence.
And you submit and obey.
Tag: avoidance
No Love
Call me cynical if you must. We all have our own philosophy on life and love. Everyone’s experience is uniquely subjective. And I have an earned level of discernment. Judge me if you must.
No one could ever break my heart, because I never expected love.
Overactive Occular
Don’t project that on me. I’m not upset in the least. There’s just a little moisture in my eye.
I’m fine.
Integration
I learned to divide myself
not out of cleverness
but out of need.
To keep the engine running,
each part learned its station:
one for winning,
one for not sitting still long enough
for the floor to give way.
Stillness was expensive.
Motion paid the bills.
I organized my inner life
like a system under pressure
efficient,
quiet,
appearing whole.
Part of You
Could it be that you were just a mirror, reflecting back at me? Was our connection state dependent? Did you feel my warmth? Or was it just a reverie?
the Purgatory of a Broken Heart 