disrespectfully, the robots in single file
march to the tune of a maddening beat
busy feet in unison greet
The road to a common purpose
The comaraderie!
No sense of self, just US
Combining for the big dive
Like a wild river over a waterfall
Like a descending cannonball
Obliterating all, to dire depths
There, their spirit-less souls are kept
Fading…
An internally reflective thing
A ghost of a being
Floating in and out of unlit rooms
No windows
Languishing in Gloom
… and an impending sense of Doom
Maniacal monologues with oneself
Reflecting ruefully to dire depths
On every minuscule thought
Every shadowy suspicion
Every duplicitous desire
Unknown sources obsessively
Spinning the windmills of thought repetitively
Going over each and every little thing
With a fine-tooth comb of paranoia
And a pomade of persecution
To lay my edges with conviction
Assuring me, that now I know
There are no doubts to cloud my thoughts
In dark solitude, I grow
Dare to disintegrate into infinite
Each spark of energy
Expands exponentially
Unlocking dazzling daydreams
A nightmarish scene
Distorting the perception of reality
Yet breathing life into the dreary
Bringing enlightenment to dead lands
A dead woman walking with tied hands
Spirit less entity
Being dragged to dire depths
With no hope to transcend
No reprieve from blight
No blessed end
Blind, roaming unconscious and in pain
Rendered reality resistant
Too triggered for existence
Delusions of persecution
Psychosis consistent
The Voices hounding me again
Offering masochistic penance for my sins
Head spinning vertigo
Ruminating obsessively
Submersed in a stressful ideology
It has captured me
I am immersed in it completely
Psychosomatic sunk cost fallacy
There is nothing to recover
Just a dreamy fantasy
Such a devastating strain
To stay the same
To be predictable, unthreatening
Appease the status quo
To blend in
Not cause a fuss
Not say much
It may strange
…but
I can change
Growing is learning
…and learning is transformative
Do I have to stay the same?
I can change
…in any way
I can shape myself to be
Anything
I can mold myself like clay
Flow like a wave
Bend like the bamboo on a windy day
Adapt
Evolve
…and rise above the fray
